I’m sitting here looking at a King sized mattress leaning on end against our couch in the living room. It’s scary. And big. We are redecorating our bedroom after 11 years of marriage and a husband/wife debate over him not wanting to change it and me wanting to. I won. My closing argument of our bedroom looking like a meth lab/drug dealing/slum, while crying pretty much closed the deal. I may have exaggerated a bit but sometimes you just have to use a little drama to explain your feelings.

Everything that was in the bedroom is now all over the house on various surfaces because the room is pretty much gutted while waiting on the carpet guys to get here. Which brings me to the point of telling you that I think we have way too many lamps.

Oh, and I need to tell you that I almost killed all of our chickens. 48 hours ago I filled their water jug and hung it back on the hook in the coop. Only I didn’t pull the cap off the water thingy that releases water into the water tray. So tonight, I went to feed and check on them. I noticed the cap and fixed it, and then sat there watching as all 30 of them gathered around drinking water for well over 10 minutes. I’m like…an accidental chicken abuser. All I could think was, “Oh my gosh what if all of them had died!?” Then I would have to tell David the truth instead of telling him I checked on the chickens and they are fine, which is exactly what I said when he asked me about the chickens tonight. I’m like…an accidental omission of truth chicken abuser.

chickens2

 

 

Oh and thankfully David doesn’t read my blog, although other people do and they always tell him about it. Many times he will randomly say, “Oh, I heard about what you said about me on your blog!” And then I’m like…trying to remember which post he is referring to and when I wrote it because I honestly can’t remember. And then when I question him about it he can’t remember specifics either which leaves us nowhere. It’s a endless cycle.

So, I’m like an accidental omission of truth chicken abuser who writes stuff that no one remembers.

I think I’ll just go to bed now.

Good night.

{ 2 comments }

gym

Dear OBGYN who raised an eyebrow and showed disapproval when I admitted I do not exercise.

I would like to claim a retraction. You see, when I was naked with only a paper bib as my shield of confidence while lying there resembling a horizontal jockey, I was a bit intimidated. In my most vulnerable position you asked me questions from which the answers would result in either, feeling successful and a respected patient of yours, or feeling as if I were a lazy human being.

I picked the latter, because I chose to be honest and admit that I do not exercise. Your silent pause and follow up question, “You don’t… exercise…at all?” brought back feelings of being in middle school and getting a test back from the school teacher with an F written in red. And circled.

So yes, I am claiming a retraction. If I had been more quick thinking in my naked state, I would have told you this.

Yes I do exercise. In fact, I exercise from the moment I get up from my bed in the morning until the moment I get back in my bed at night. I have my own gym inside my house.  No, there are no treadmills or weight lifting machines. Who needs those? I have heavy baskets filled with folded laundry being lifted and carried to children’s bedrooms. I work out my arms often throughout the day, far more than any weight lifter in the mirror filled room at the gym because I am lifting 40 to 50 lb children ongoing for 14 hours a day. I don’t need a rowing machine; I have a mop and a dirty floor. AND a heavy vacuum cleaner. I don’t need an exercise class to speed my heart rate up. This happens at least 4 times a day as I do my toy and clutter house pass-through. I don’t need to go walk a track somewhere else. I am on my feet walking, all. day. long.

In closing, thank you doctor for doing your job and asking the required questions. However, maybe it is time for all doctors to first ask, “Do you have any young children?” And if the answer is yes, leave it at that.

Sincerely,

Healthy, fit, mom who never exercises

{ 7 comments }

The Colonoscopy Diaries – part 3, final chapter

June 30, 2014 musings from my somewhat sane mind

This is the final chapter of my colonoscopy story. I saw you just roll your eyes. Stop it. I wanted to talk about my husband. We are right in the middle of redecorating our bedroom. And by redecorating, I mean REDECORATING. New carpet, new bedroom furniture, new paint, new everything. If this ever happens to […]

Read the full article →

The Colonoscopy Diaries – Part 2

June 28, 2014 musings from my somewhat sane mind

All I can say is find a doctor who uses Gatorade or pills for prep. Y’all, I’m telling you…the prep the day before a colonoscopy is horrible. When I picked up my gallon container of colon prep, I had no idea what was in store for me. I mixed it “to the fill line” with […]

Read the full article →

The Colonoscopy Diaries – part 1

June 26, 2014 musings from my somewhat sane mind

A lot happens when you turn 50. The joy of inexperience is behind you, as well as the mistakes. The joy of looking ahead to new paths that you now have the time, and means, to explore. The joy of knowing what you became when you grew up. And your age 50 first colonoscopy. And […]

Read the full article →

Raising Chickens: As if I didn’t have enough mouths to feed already!

June 23, 2014 Chickens

  Now we have chickens. And I know nothing about them. Thankfully, David is taking over the care and maintenance of these little buggers and I’m googling facts whenever I have the time. Like now. Want to know what chickens can eat besides grain? Pretty much anything, such as table and cooking scraps. We have […]

Read the full article →