I would make a bad burgler

February 15, 2012

in Parenting

It is late at night. The house is dimly lit and everyone but myself is asleep. I tip toe quietly up the stairs, stop at the top, and slowly peek into the boys room. Things are good. Both are asleep. However one boy is a deep sleeper and the other one is not. The latter one is the one I’m worried about. So I have to handle this task meticulously. I take slow steps and slow my breathing and movements so not to make any noise. I had already rotated all my ankle joints before entering their room so I could get all the pops and creaks out.

I’m walking in slow motion up to Deep Sleeper’s bed, while cutting my eyes constantly at Light Sleeper to make sure he isn’t looking at me. All is good. I get on my knees and slide my hand slowly, carefully under his pillow. I’m looking for his tooth. Because tonight, I am the Tooth Fairy.

Heads are heavy. I never really thought about that before and now is not the time to think about Deep Sleepers head weight, so I clear my head of that thought and focused on the task. (I’m easily distracted). I close my eyes and let my fingers spread and search under the pillow waiting to feel the wrapped up tooth he had placed under there. I can’t. So I tip toe to the other side of the bed so I can try from this angle. Light Sleeper moves. I stop and freeze, prepared to give my excuse in case he wakes up. Only, I realize I do not not have one yet. Things are getting out of hand and I need to get this done and fast because I have been in here way too long. I am pushing my luck.

On the other side of the bed, I crouch on the floor, my head is level with Deep Sleepers head, I can feel his breath on my cheek, and I slowly slide my hand under. Can’t feel it. Then I realize something no tooth fairy wants to find out. The tooth is smack nab under his head. Ugh – so I’m going to have to push my hand under his head to get to it. I watch his face as I force my hand under the weight of his head which causes the pillow and his head to raise up slightly. GOT IT!

I slide my hand back slowly, raise myself up to a standing position, take one step towards the door, pleased as punch that this is over…and then…





P.S. Light Sleeper didn’t seem to remember “seeing” the tooth fairy last night. And I will totally lie about it if he brings it up.

P.S.S. Next up – find out what else I found under his pillow besides the tooth.

Stephanie February 15, 2012 at 12:08 pm

Aww, TOO funny. …and how have/will you ever get a tooth from under the light-sleeper’s pillow?! ;)
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Deb February 16, 2012 at 10:24 am

I’m going to follow Liz’s advice above. lol

Liz @ A Nut in a Nutshell February 15, 2012 at 1:46 pm

That job used to totally stress me out! I finally had them start leaving it in a little pillow thing on their doorknob.
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Deb February 16, 2012 at 10:24 am

love it

Mercy Mathews February 16, 2012 at 9:45 am

Hilarious :) I’m sure your heart stopped for a second there! Mine would have :)
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Deb February 16, 2012 at 10:24 am

oh yes it it!

Kathy February 16, 2012 at 12:45 pm

I loved this post!! I have been in the same situation myself and it is really nerve wracking! I love that these are the little things we will remember about our lives as a parent and what our kids will remember!! Just great! Thanks!
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Tracey February 16, 2012 at 8:15 pm

LOL—sooo been THERE!!! And the tooth fairy has forgotten to visit sometimes. But then on those nights it turns out that the money actually fell, under the bed, and mom or dad usually finds it when they go in to “help” the child make the bed! :)
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Tracy @ Scribblesaurus Me February 18, 2012 at 11:11 am

LOL – I’m so incredibly clumsy that I may just have to send in the hubby once the boy starts losing his baby teeth.

Kimberlee February 18, 2012 at 12:12 pm

Oh my goodenss…so funny. And so perfectly written. We do the tooth pillow at our house, because honestly I’m like a bull in a china cabinet and would wake both light sleeper and deep sleeper in my quest. And speaking of that the saying a bull in a china cabinet is false! I watched it on mythbusters.
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